Ash Wednesday – Finding Ourselves in the Dust

Ash Wednesday will soon be upon us—literally, if we attend a service with the imposition of ashes. Receiving the mixture of oil and ash in the shape of a cross on one’s forehead comes with the reminder to “remember that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”

These words are part of a ritual I have long found meaningful even as I resisted what I took to be its message. But my attitude toward the Ash Wednesday service, with its stark reminder of death, has evolved over the years. I’ve moved from rejection of what I perceived as a dark view of life and death, to acknowledgment of death’s inevitability, to appreciation of a ritual that honors the reality of our limited time on earth. But I’ve always thought of that return to dust as happening literally, at our physical death.

Last night I dreamed I was on my belly in a dusty yard, struggling to move forward without being able to raise myself up. I was without strength or power, in contact with the ground. I could see plants growing at eye level and I thought of the healing herbs I wanted to grow. Later in the dream I was walking, but cars zoomed by leaving me in the dust.

I woke from the dream with a sense of vulnerability, yet feeling oddly peaceful. As I worked with the images from the dream I felt a shift occur. My experience of dust in the dream opened a new way of understanding the dust proclaimed in the Ash Wednesday liturgy.

Returning to the dust doesn’t happen only at our death. We return to the dust over and over as life knocks us off our feet. It feels like a defeat, which it is: a de-feat (or even de-feet), not something we accomplish but something done to us, something we endure. Some power outside our control brings a new reality we wouldn’t have chosen. Our plans and expectations turn to dust, and life as we know it is over.

But in the dust we’re back where we came from, supported by our connection with the earth. The word humble has the same root as humus (Latin for soil) and human. In the humility of experiencing our limitations, we find ourselves supported by a greater strength.  Being humble puts us in touch with what Paul Tillich called the Ground of Being. Our vulnerability brings us into contact with the real support life offers, as opposed to the illusory supports we try to create for ourselves.

Finding ourselves in the dust is a blow to the ego but growth for the soul. It grounds us and helps us remember who we are. On the ground we’re in the place where life is rooted and healing herbs grow. We experience the solidity of the earth upon which we walk. We remember our dependence on it, our oneness with it. And throughout our time in this world, the earth strengthens us as we regain our balance and rise again.

The ritual of Ash Wednesday’s imposition of ashes is a reminder of how brief our lives are. But it also speaks to the many times we find ourselves in the dust over the course of a lifetime. In those times the dust can be a place where we encounter the grounding and strength always supporting us. In the dust we encounter the essence of life and of ourselves. Ash Wednesday isn’t the dismal ritual I once thought it was. Rather, it points to how the heart of life is often hidden in the places where we least want to look.

Why I do Dreamwork

For years, I have benefited from sharing dreams and exploring their interpretation in a dream group. In my ongoing training as a spiritual director, the art of working dreams is an important aspect of my education as well. This is not because dreams offer simple answers—there is rarely a clearly definable “meaning” of a dream. But nonetheless dreamwork puts me in touch with the issues at the heart of my life, showing me what’s going on beneath the surface and helping me to grow in spirit.

flowers-by-lamplight

Dreams offer access to a place of wisdom within. This quiet center, present in all of us, offers a clear perspective on what’s happening in our lives. It perceives how emotion colors what we see and understand, and how old patterns of thought and behavior affect the ways we live. This place of wisdom is tuned in to the forces that drive us—forces that have power over us, in part, because we are not consciously aware of them.

Our everyday awareness filters our experience. The waking mind often ignores details it deems irrelevant to our conscious priorities. But the unconscious mind takes everything in, and processes our lives at a depth we can’t manage consciously. The wisdom of the unconscious notices what our everyday awareness overlooks. It makes connections between current situations and events from the past. Its insights have found expression in art and religion throughout human history. Just as our lungs know how to breathe, our inner wisdom knows the way forward. It is always urging us towards health and wholeness.

Every night in our dreams, we have access to how this inner wisdom reflects on our experiences and points in the direction we need to travel.

Yet dreams can be bewildering because they speak to us in the language of symbols. Dreams come through a part of the brain that generates images rather than words. Rather than offering a discourse on our way of moving through life, a dream will put us in a car. That car might be going too fast, or toiling up a winding road. It might be dilapidated and in need of replacement, or have a driver who isn’t listening. As we explore the dream symbols and our associations with them, we learn the vocabulary of our unconscious. We sometimes gain insight by asking ourselves whether something in waking life feels like the situation presented in the dream.

Dreams do their work regardless of whether or not we consciously engage with them. But when we invite the insights of our dreaming mind into waking life, it’s like opening a window to a fresh breeze. Dreamwork helps clear the air of our stale patterns of thought. As we notice how a dream describes, interprets, or responds to our experience, we grow more attuned to what’s going on around and within us. To be more open to the message of our dreams is to be more open to the flow of life.

Our dreams can be an important tool for growth. They show where we might need to pay attention. They meet us where we are, allow insight into what we’re ready to see, and always come in the service of health and wholeness. Dreams offer a natural and accessible bridge between the wisdom of the unconscious and our waking life. This allows our conscious awareness to become broader and deeper, and helps us live a more full and abundant life.